We were on our stomachs, behind bushes
Elbows sinking into the soil
Faces inches away, senses craving for more of the earth
It was a loud silence
Not an empty one, though
Images flitted by in my head
I was thinking of the future
It was going to be without you
I was focused on cleaning one nail with the other, as I talked
The words coming out of my mouth felt half empty,
my brain fought to go backwards
the sight ahead showed me a cliff
Coming nearer every time I opened my eyes
A fog of scenes, even those that hadn’t happened yet,
was pressed on Autoplay
I wasn’t sure whether to focus on that or to
record every second of that present moment,
to replay it later
I could go back to that place now and try to see us again
I could focus on your voice this time instead of those in my head
If parting is still difficult this time round,
I would know I was wrong to choose a clean break.


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